Part one

Ben and Dillon where driving along an isolated desert. Flashes of lightning roars of thunder and rain as hard as bullets were hitting the roof of the car. “I think we should stop and rest at this abandoned shack.”

“Wait a minute Dillon who is that person at the door in the long black cloak.”

 “I’m not sure but it does not look good….. Wait this is where I used to live we need to go NOW quick, go just get in the car. Open the door and get in. Put your foot down."

“Why did we need to go so suddenly?”

“My father and mother disappeared here and became ghouls. So I ran a way and ever since they have been trying to make me one of them.”   

Comments that people have made about this blog post

Comment 1 Comment by Mr Jones on 20 Dec 13 at 1:04pm | Quote this comment
Joe, great to see you adding to the blog. I really love the phrase "abondoned shack" that you have used here.

In your next Chapter, can you add a little more description to go alongside the dialogue, to add even more tension?

I am really looking forward to reading it (gulp - it is a little scary!)
Comment 2 Comment by Eloise W on 21 Dec 13 at 12:40pm | Quote this comment
wow i love this how could you write a story or part like this. ;-)
Comment 3 Comment by Olivia B on 26 Dec 13 at 9:25pm | Quote this comment
I like the use of description, it makes it interesting and reflects on cause and a affect.

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