Demon Teacher

Sleepily and slowly I tiptoed out of my old oak bed and onto the pink shaggy carpet on my floor. I pulled down my dark blue jumper and crystal white blouse from the wooden hanger and started getting dressed. “Today is going to be a good day” I said to myself in my head but then I reminded myself, “Well, we do have the best teacher ever!” Our teacher is Mr Crowbar. Yes, he does sound like someone you will find stealing the crown jewels. He is amazing. He has thinning hair and a big cheery smile. He sometimes even laughs when we do something bad. He wears wacky ties that his wife makes. My favorite one is one that has “Mr Cheerful” embroidered on the front of it. I can't wait to see him again today. MEEP .Thats the school bus. I ran out of the door and leapt onto the bus just in time. The driver Mr Low said, “Good morning Emma” and I nodded back gingerly. When I got to Saint Oakbridge, my school, (some people call it the prison), I walked in and settled myself down in my chair but I got a little bit bored waiting for Mr Crowbar to come through the door so I started to doodle on my arm.  I drew a pretty white daisy and an image of our class pet Barry the hamster. Barry is really old and smart. He squeaks when he sees a student doing something bad like eating yummy sweets or doodling like me. Then I heard an ear splitting scream and I swiveled round to find Alice, my best friend, being traumatized by a guy with a mohawk. I got kind of scared and I was about to shout “STRANGER!” at him when he span round and glared at me with his lifeless gray eyes then he pulled Alice to her seat .“ My name is Mr Sunshine.” Some of the children in the class laughed at him and he heard them. “This is not a joke” he boomed across the class room. No one laughed at him after that. Barry squealed in his cage and Mr Sunshine, very strangely, backed away. I think he is scared. I suddenly had an excellent plan. I asked Alice if I could borrow some of her lovely refreshing spearmint chewing gum and I chewed it all through a really random and boring history lesson about Henry The Eighth. Every time Barry squeaked Mr Sunshine would flinch and back away. Barry was so angry with me that he threw a massive squeaking fit. Mr Sunshine screamed really loudly and ran out the classroom door. My plan has worked. Mr Sunshine had gone.......

He is frightened of hamsters!

Comments that people have made about this blog post

Comment 1 Comment by Mr Herring on 21 Feb 12 at 3:49pm | Quote this comment
Ella - this is a really good story, with lots of brilliant vocabulary - I love the following descriptions:
'...thinning hair and big cheery smile...wacky ties...', '...I nodded back gingerly (great adverb!)...' and ' ear splitting scream...'

Maybe others could comment about what language really helped them 'enter in' to the story?

However, to finish it off, I wonder whether you could go back through and correct the speech punctuation - make sure everything is correct e.g.

...I reminded myself, (puncuation before you open speech marks) "Well (capital letter for the first word of speech) we do have the best teacher ever. (punctuation before you close speech marks)"
Comment 2 Comment by Lauren J on 23 Feb 12 at 5:07pm | Quote this comment
Nice Ella! I like the idia of the hampster!
Comment 3 Comment by Sarah L on 24 Feb 12 at 9:48am | Quote this comment
This is a really good story and I really liked the fact that this weird teacher with a mowhawk is scared of hamsters. :P Well done Ella!

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